NAPATSORN TREESAP

Am I dead while being alive?
‘Cause why I feel like I’m struggling to breathe while I’m drowning
Another glimpse of trauma, would it be okay?
Just another day without pleasant— it might be fine

A shadow of existence, where are you? 
Hiding in my own grave, is that true?
I’ve been seeking for you all the places I knew
Except for the grave— I dug on my own 

Weeper, why‘s your life married with sorrow?
Since then you have never known tomorrow
Will this sorrow die with you—
Like an eternal lover?

Oh, threnody—
My life is like a threnody 
Perform in a painful melody 
Slowly dying in an agony 

Flawlessly— my whole heart‘s destroyed completely
Screaming loudly on the balcony of insecurity 
Stand still deadly—
Without any signs of hope

Breathing tiredly every time I fall asleep 
A nightmare’s crawling, hunting me deeply
Trembling with fear but it’s whispering in my ears
“See! I’ll always succeed”

Fragility— Is that the name of a woman on the other side of the mirror? 
Are those memories hitting you again in terror? 
Why’re you shivering again
Like the time—you lost your pitiful soul?

I swear I’ve been striving for all the past years 
Pushing someone out, no one sees me going out for all these years 
I don’t know why I‘m still terribly stuck in here
While I’m trying so hard to live far apart with tear

©2022 Napatsorn Treesap